morguefile

At some point in our lives we have all been dumped in a less than mature fashion.  It used be the phone call or a note left on the car. Today it is the text message, the email or even worse sending a friend to break up with your soon to be ex.   All of these methods are insensitive, disrespectful and downright hateful, yet more and more people are resorting to a passive aggressive approach to the breakup.

Now, it seems there is money to be made off of scum sucking dirt bags that can’t even do the dirty work themselves. Several companies now offer packages that will do the breaking up for you.   The cost ranges depending on the type of break up ordered.  For example, a standard split of a relationship will be about $10.00, a called off engagement will run $25.00 and a divorce will cost you $50.00.  If that’s not embarrassing enough, the break up is done by phone and recorded.  It can be uploaded to a website that lets anyone listen to your ex getting her heart broken.

Another site has email templates that let you pick your reasons for breaking up from a menu of options.  The choices range from funny to rather to the point, “I think you’re hotter when you’re tan” to “I caught you cheating.”

You can even get your message across by sending dead flowers.  

It’s a cowardly approach that at least clearly defines the guy as a schmuck.  So for those of you who wind up on the receiving end of a bouquet of dead flowers, just remember it has nothing to do with you.  He really is the problem.

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Tags: break ups, ending a relationship, text messages, email
Categories: Dating stories